When a man tells a Black woman that she looks mixed as a form of endearment, he is insinuating that her beauty comes from the (allegedly) non-Black part of her. All they’re effectively saying is: You’re too beautiful to just be Black.

Oh, but I am.

We aren’t beautiful in spite of our Blackness; we are beautiful because of it.

Shayla Pierce

[photo ©Djo, Bibi Kassembe]



  1. K E Garland · March 11, 2016


    Liked by 2 people

  2. Kushite Prince · March 12, 2016

    Great post! This goes in line with my recent post. I guess we’re on the same wavelength at the moment. 😉

    Liked by 2 people

    • kelley · March 12, 2016

      Same waves indeed, published within just hours of each other

      Liked by 2 people

  3. nosyjosie · March 13, 2016

    Preach! Just because you don’t realize you’re saying something insulting, doesn’t make it any less insulting

    Liked by 3 people

  4. TheOriginalBlackWoman13 · April 2, 2016

    Great post! *sigh* if black women aren’t tired of hearing this foolishness.

    Liked by 1 person

    • kelley · April 2, 2016

      Yea. It’s old. And what does it matter if one is mixed or not? Can’t she just be pretty?

      Liked by 1 person

  5. TheOriginalBlackWoman13 · April 2, 2016

    Reblogged this on Fighting Misogynoir and commented:

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Amber Choisella · April 7, 2016

    All of my life I have gotten asked what my ethnicity I am and I’ve never been offended, probably because I’m oblivious to “racism” that isn’t so blatant. I don’t know…. I am who I am despite what my face shows or my skin displays. I originate from a multi-race background so diversity is what I’m accustomed too. The only important, more essential part of our identity is that who know who we are individually, not entirely just based on ethnicity or culture, but our higher true self. Beauty comes in all sorts of shapes, colors, and ideas. Anything can be beautiful, perspective is key. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • kelley · April 7, 2016

      That last statement is clutch, Amber. Thanks for your comment.

      Liked by 1 person

      • Amber Choisella · April 7, 2016

        Thank you😊


  7. jason · January 19

    We are all mixed with something. And, beauty is in the eye of the beholder… so love yourself, no matter your shade or ethnicity. Everyone has their preference of who they’re attracted to.


    • kelley · January 19

      Then can’t a woman just be pretty? If your last statement were true then my ethnic background should not matter enough to mention, right? I believe it’s a matter of fetishization and popularity, what’s trending. What men are often conditioned to like and prefer.

      Again, can’t a woman just be pretty? Not for being mixed or pretty for a dark girl. Just pretty.

      Liked by 1 person

      • jason · January 19

        Well, everyone should be free to have their type. Not all men are handsome… if we’re just talking physical attributes, height & weight usually matters to women. (Honestly speaking)
        But, the question is “what it is that makes her pretty?” And I feel that’s in the eye of the beholder.


        • kelley · January 19

          True, but from my interpretation of the post and your response, there’s no correlation.


  8. 1tawnystranger · January 21

    Who is the woman in that picture? She’s GORGEOUS!!!

    Liked by 1 person

    • kelley · January 21

      I knoooooow! Bibi Kassembe is her name.


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